We are born from a relationship and grew up in one. We have been formed by a relationship and also damaged. What we have seen and experienced as a child, or have missed, we take that into our relationships today. If we, as a child, have not experienced a loving adult (parent, caretaker), then chances are that a loving adult has not strongly developeded in ourselves as well. And won)t often be present in later relationships. Then we fall back on the emotions and experiences of the child in us.
Relationships often begin implicitly based on childish hopes and fears. For example, starting off from a lack of love, fulfillment or recognition as a child. Or from the expectation that the other should always be there for you and automatically understand you completely. Or from the fear that the other will abandon you if you do not meet up to his or her expectations. Or from the fear that the other person will come close too you and you’ll lose yourself. Read on: